Last night I'm out with Bunny and D-Rock at my new favorite Chicago bar. He sees a girl he wants to hit on, and of course, I am obligated to talk to her fat friend.
But this was a different fat girl. This fat girl thought she was smart. That is a bad thing for a fat girl to think...especially when she is almost criminally stupid. And around Tucker Max.
She asked me what I did for a living. I told her she wouldn't believe me. She insisted I tell her. I told her I was a diet consultant. She asked me where I went to school. Then it got bad:
Fat girl "Where did you go to school?"
Tucker "University of Chicago."
Fat girl "What was your degree in?"
Tucker "Econ."
Fat girl "Econ? What can you do with an econ degree?"
At that point, I was laughing so hard I had to walk away. D-Rock just shook his head.
Fat girl "No really, what can you do with an econ degree?"
Tucker "You obviously went to a state school. A BAD state school."
Fat girl "I want to know what you can do with an econ degree."
Tucker "Do you even know what finance is?"
Fat girl "You can't work in finance with an econ degree. You need a finance degree."
God bless her oversized heart. I haven't laughed that hard in months. While I composed myself, D-Rock tried to explain to her that an econ degree from the University of Chicago is one of the top five most marketable degrees, along with engineering/comp sci from MIT and maybe one or two Harvard degrees. And that a finance degree is basically just a watered down econ degree for stupid state school idiots. I finally composed myself and came back for the resolution:
Tucker "Seriously, what state school did you go to?"
Fat girl "Michigan State."
Tucker "HAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHHHAHHAHHAHHAHA. YOU ARE SO STUPID I FEEL BAD FOR YOU! HAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAH."
Unintentional comedy at it's finest. It's not easy to make me laugh that hard.
Posted by Tucker Max at 9:12 PM