I'm walking around Chicago and I run into a Greenpeace petition drive. For some odd reason Greenpeace decided to use five hot chicks to gather signatures. Devious bastards.

One of the hotties approaches me, and though she is beautiful, I can't resist informing her that I am against her socialist proposal, and counter with a market based solution. This does not go over well. She calls over a crony who proceeds to engage in a fit of histrionics that would make Gidget blush. She mindlessly spouts off the company line like she's in an infomercial, perhaps due to the fact that she is suffering from the intellectual equivalent of Stockholm Syndrome. I offered to sit her in front of a strobe light to deprogram her, but no dice.

Then, mainly for the comedic value, I ask her if she wants to go to Morton's with me for to get a steak--again, no. She is "against the slaughter of animals." I tell her that I'll overlook the fact that she's wearing leather sandals, if she'll overlook the fact that I like meat. She then informs me that she is "repulsed" by me. I guess that's a little harder to overlook than dietary choices.

Posted by at 12:10 AM

Print Friendly · Digg it · del.icio.us · StumbleUpon · Netscape